Mystery In Wax
Reviewed by Bruce Dettman

When I visited London a few years ago, I was regrettably unable to get in to see Madame Tussaud's Wax Museum. The line for tickets was nearly a block long so as a compromise I elected to visit nearby Baker Street and the Sherlock Holmes Museum where I paid seven euros to watch a snooty guide point at a picture of Raymond Massey as Holmes and tell the assembled crowd that it was Peter Cushing. I was sorry to miss out on Tusaad's, however, not only because it is famous the world over for having the greatest assortment of wax effigies, but because as with so many others, the dark side of these figures has always intrigued me. Forget the replicas of Marilyn, Winston, and J.F.K. Get me to Lizzie Borden, Jack the Ripper, Rasputin and John Wilkes Booth ASAP. Hollywood, of course, has long been interested in the subject dating back as far as German director Paul Leni's silent Waxworks then continuing through such memorable cinematic exercises as Mystery of the Wax Museum and the later remake House of Wax with Vincent Price. What the allure of these waxen replicas is might be the province of the psychologist, but there is no doubt that even in our high tech world wax museums continued to pull 'em in.

Madame Selena (played by the gloriously over-the-top Myra McKinney who chews enough scenery to get balsa wood poisoning) in the first season's Mystery in Wax episode calls her establishment "Madame Selena's Museum of Wax Art" which, if you're interested, is located a 919 West Boulevard in Metropolis. Apparently, the notion that there is no such thing as bad publicity strikes a real entrepreneurial chord with Madame because she decides to elevate interest in her exhibits by predicting the deaths of certain prominent Metropolis citizens.

She actually kidnaps-with the help of Andrew, her dim-witted Casper Milktoast of a husband-(Oscar Levant look-alike Lester Sharpe) and imprisons them in her private dungeon. She makes wax replicas of her victims which bring in the paying public (TAOS budget couldn't afford actual wax replicas to be fashioned so they made up the actors employing what looks like talcum powder to produce the waxen effect). Her third target is Perry White who does not take kindly to her prophetic threats ("Before my paper is through with you I'm going to have you run out of town!") Instead, however, Perry is drugged, his suicide faked and imprisoned along with the others. Inspector Henderson hints that perhaps White was inebriated which draws fire from Clark ("Perry White was never drunk a day in his life!"). Lois meanwhile can't stop crying over the Chief's death (no Jimmy in this one) but Clark smells a rat and decides to investigate. This gives Lois an idea so she dries her tears and goes over to the museum and hides after it formally closes. Sneaking around she stumbles upon the basement dungeon but is discovered crouching under a table and subdued with the help of some chloroform by Madame Selena (I personally have a bit of trouble thinking Phyllis Coats' tough as nails Lois couldn't handle this desiccated old shrew) and tossed into one of the jail cells next to Perry. By this time, Kent and Henderson show up at the door and demand to look around. Clark's X-Ray peepers alerts him to the fact that something rotten is going on downstairs so he fakes a poor shoe tying job while Henderson goes on without him and changes into Superman. There is a rather odd development here as far as logical plotting is concerned when Selena and Andrew take Henderson down into the basement to see their "private" museum. I know Selena is nuttier than a Christmas fruitcake but does she really not think Henderson will object to a group of missing Metropolis citizens imprisoned in cages? Before he can say anything, however, Selena, seeing Superman freeing her human exhibits, charges the Man of Steel. He hands her off to Henderson, subdues Andrew, and frees Perry and Lois.

There's lots of lapses of logic in this episode and Superman never once takes to the skies but I like it anyway. Maybe it's that crazy Madame Selena or Lois showing a more human side when she thinks the Chief is dead. Or maybe it's just that wax museum.

Next time...London.

March 2006
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